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Thursday, January 17

  1. page The page of Will, chapter 9 edited ... YOR ERTH GLENN MILLR WS NT ONLY A GRAT MUSICAN, BT LSO A SPAC TRAVL GENIUS. F YOR "NASA&q…
    ...
    YOR ERTH GLENN MILLR WS NT ONLY A GRAT MUSICAN, BT LSO A SPAC TRAVL GENIUS. F YOR "NASA" HD RED SOM F HS THERIES, YU GYS MIGHT BE A LOT FARTHR ALNG WTH YOR SPAC TRAVL EFFRTS.
    BT LETS CNTINU WTH TH STORY I WS TLLNG YU ERLIER.
    CHAPTER 10
    (view changes)
    1:24 pm

Sunday, November 25

  1. page the page of will, chapter 8 edited ... [Bzsrgpt is inturrupted by a gigantic explosion, a garbled attempt at communication over the d…
    ...
    [Bzsrgpt is inturrupted by a gigantic explosion, a garbled attempt at communication over the damaged P.A. system, and a wooshing sound as your ship reaches and enters the escape conduit, deactivating it in the process. your ship shudders and just barely manages to stay in one piece as the normal laws of physics rush back into application around you. Your severely damaged ship reels, but does not break apart.]
    OKA, LOKS LIK TH RST F TH STRY S GONNA HAV TO WAT. WE'R GONG TO HAV TO LANCH TH ESCAP PODS, BECAS THS SHP S NEVR GOING TO GT US BACK TO CIVILIZATION.
    Chapter 9
    (view changes)
    8:31 am
  2. page The page of Will, chapter 9 edited [Bzsrgpt leads you along a long, poorly lit hallway to a small, round door with one of those great…
    [Bzsrgpt leads you along a long, poorly lit hallway to a small, round door with one of those great big airlocks and gestures to you]
    YU GT N FRST. I'V ALREDY STORD TH MEMRY BANKS CONTANING YOR MIND ON TH ESCAP POD'S CMPUTR.
    [The airlock hisses open, and you suddenly find yourself spontaneously lifted into the air and through the airlock into a small, rounded room full of lighted monitor displays and control panels, with a large 360 degree navigation screen stretched around the cockpit. Surprised at your strange mode of entry, you look shed a look of bewilderment upon Bzsrgpt, who merely floats in himself as if it were the most natural thing in the world]
    How did you do that?
    WHAT, TH FLOTING? T'S ESY. ALL YU HAV TO DO S CONCENTRAT HARD AND YU CN LFT THNGS FR AWA FRM YU.
    You mean telekinesis? I can't do that, and I don't think any other humans can do it either. Can all Yzxdglns do it?
    OF CORS! MOST F THM CAN DO T BETTR THN I CN TO!
    [Utterly bewildered, you watch as Bzsrgpt shuts the airlock and activates a few control consoles next to a large viewscreen, which at present is black. He pulls a lever and then buckles himself into a seatbelted chair]
    BETTR HOLD TIGHT. WER ABOUT TO EXT TH SHP, ND T SN'T GONG TO BE FN. THS ESCAP POD'S MAGNTC STABLIZRS ARN'T TH BST.
    [The small, dark, and cramped interior of the escape pod begins to vibrate wildly, as a loud humming noise, and a grating sound like something rotating fills the air. The hissing of air and feul pipes shutting off and disconnecting can also be heard, but a wave of turbulence hits the ship as the first layer of airlock is opened, which you can see on the now activated viewscreen. You hear a loud "cha-chunk" sound as the escape pod disconnects from its stand. Bzsrgpt presses more buttons, causing the pod to hover into the air and move slowly towards the opening airlock and out into the star-studded void of space. Stars rush past you as the escape pod zooms forward. Bzsrgpt continues to press buttons, gazing at a smaller viewscreen as he does so. Finally, he seems to find what he wants, presses a few buttons, and pushes down a pedal. Everything goes black almost instantly.]
    What just happened?
    WE WER SUCKD UP BY A TRANSPRT STATION. NOW TS BOUNCNG US ACROSS AN ALTRNAT UNIVRS TO GT US THER.
    Excuse me?
    DO I NED TO EXPLAN YZXDGLN SPAC TRAVL METHDS NW? CS I RLLY DON'T WNT TO. I DON'T RLLY NDRSTAND THM MYSELF.
    Uh, yeah. Could you at least try?
    OKA, THS CLD TAK A WHIL. BACK N TH DA, WE YZXDGLNS TRAVLD AT ABOT TH SPED YOR SPECES CN NW. T WSN'T SO BD FR US, BECAS WE HD LNGR LIFSPNS, BT T WS STLL PRTTY ANNOYNG TRYNG TO GT PLACS OR EXPLOR OTR SPAC. BT THN, A YZXDGLN NAMD SDRGLZRGD NVENTD TH TIM RA META-ENGIN. THE TIM RA META-ENGIN CULD BRAK A SHP DOWN NTO ENRGY CMPONNTS, WHCH WR THN BRODCASTD AS WAVS AT LMOST TH SPED F LIGHT. THES WAVS VIBRATD N WAYS THT PRESRVD A CNTAND REALTY WITHN THM, WHER TH CRW EXISTD AS NORML. TH WAVS WER SUCKD NTO A TRANSPRT STATION, AND BRODCASTD THRUGH A CNTAND WRMHOL NTO AN EMPTY UNIVERS. TH RAS BONC OFF F TH WALLS F TH UNIVERS, GVNG THM MOMNTM NT POSSIBL N ORS. THEY BONC BACK THRUGH TH WRMHL ND BACK NTO OR UNIVERS AT TH NXT TRANSPRT STATION.
    Um... oh.
    I KNW. T DIDN'T MAK SENS WHN HGXCL XPLAND T TO ME, ETHR.
    HERE. THS S SPPOSD TO HELP TH PRCESS GO FSTR.
    [Bzsrgpt presses a button on the console and you are surprised to hear the bouncy notes of "In the Mood" fill the cabin]
    What? This helps space travel? I mean, Glenn Miller was a genius and all, but that's just kind of weird.
    YOR ERTH GLENN MILLR WS NT ONLY A GRAT MUSICAN, BT LSO A SPAC TRAVL GENIUS. F YOR "NASA" HD RED SOM F HS THERIES, YU GYS MIGHT BE A LOT FARTHR ALNG WTH YOR SPAC TRAVL EFFRTS.
    BT LETS CNTINU WTH TH STORY I WS TLLNG YU ERLIER.

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    8:28 am
  3. page the page of will, chapter 8 edited ... O NO. NT NW. DARN T. What is it, Bzsrgpt? ... F TH MARIE MARY CELESTE, A [Bzsrgpt is i…
    ...
    O NO. NT NW. DARN T.
    What is it, Bzsrgpt?
    ...
    F TH MARIEMARY CELESTE, A
    [Bzsrgpt is inturrupted by a gigantic explosion, a garbled attempt at communication over the damaged P.A. system, and a wooshing sound as your ship reaches and enters the escape conduit, deactivating it in the process. your ship shudders and just barely manages to stay in one piece as the normal laws of physics rush back into application around you. Your severely damaged ship reels, but does not break apart.]
    OKA, LOKS LIK TH RST F TH STRY S GONNA HAV TO WAT. WE'R GONG TO HAV TO LANCH TH ESCAP PODS, BECAS THS SHP S NEVR GOING TO GT US BACK TO CIVILIZATION.
    (view changes)
    8:25 am

Friday, September 21

  1. page the page of will, chapter 7 edited ... Would you mind if I used your universe model to view Earth? I must admit that I'm very curious…
    ...
    Would you mind if I used your universe model to view Earth? I must admit that I'm very curious as to what happened to it.
    OF CORS. ASK ME IF YU NED HELP WITH IT. OTHRWIS, I'LL LET YU DO IT N PEC.
    ...
    NUCLEAR DEFENCE SYSTEM."]
    SYSTEM."]
    Chapter 8

    (view changes)
    3:12 pm

Thursday, September 20

  1. page the page of will, chapter 8 edited ... [Bzsrgpt is inturrupted by a gigantic explosion, a garbled attempt at communication over the d…
    ...
    [Bzsrgpt is inturrupted by a gigantic explosion, a garbled attempt at communication over the damaged P.A. system, and a wooshing sound as your ship reaches and enters the escape conduit, deactivating it in the process. your ship shudders and just barely manages to stay in one piece as the normal laws of physics rush back into application around you. Your severely damaged ship reels, but does not break apart.]
    OKA, LOKS LIK TH RST F TH STRY S GONNA HAV TO WAT. WE'R GONG TO HAV TO LANCH TH ESCAP PODS, BECAS THS SHP S NEVR GOING TO GT US BACK TO CIVILIZATION.

    (view changes)
    2:31 pm
  2. page the page of will, chapter 8 edited Chapter 8 [Shocked By this new development,you manage to ignopre Bzsrgpt's first frantic expressi…
    Chapter 8
    [Shocked By this new development,you manage to ignopre Bzsrgpt's first frantic expressions of excitement, until he actually yells to get your robot body's attention. You look up, and see him bradishing a handheld monitor and pointing excitedly at the readout.]
    THS S IT! ITS OUR WA OT F HERE! TH PROXIMTY REDOT SAS THERS A YZXDGLN SHP CMING NTO OUR CMMUNICATONS RANG! THEY PROBLY LEFT AN ESCAP CONDUIT BEHND THM! F WE CN CNTACT THM, WE CN REQEST TO USE IT TO GT OUT OF HERE!
    Are you sure they don't mean us harm?
    NO, BT IF THEY START SHOTNG US, THN WE'LL KNOW FOR SUR THT THEY WNT TO KILL US.
    Yeah, but how are we supposed to escape once they do that?
    OH, WE'LL JST FIGHT THM OFF. IT'LL BE ESY. OUR DEFENS SYSTMS AR JUST AS GOOD AS THER'S
    Well, I'll take your word for it.
    [At this point you are troubled by the realization that Bzsrgpt was wrong, and that the gigantic warship coming rapidly towards you has begun to fire jets of plasma at your ship.]
    O NO! YU WER RIGHT, WE SHD NEVR HAV TRUSTD THM FR ON MINUT! ACTVAT ALL DEFENS SYSTEMS! GO GO GO!
    [You scramble to activate the defense systems, communing with the ship's central computers to figure out what to do. It turns out that the myriad of defense algorithms and apparati on the ship are layed out with such debilitating complexity as to make it almost impossible to decipher them in time to save the ship. You quickly decide to go with the simplest autopilot defence algorithm you can find,which utilizes a strategem something along the lines of,"sheilds on full power, fire all weapons, escape."]
    GOOD CHOIC F ALGRITHMS. I DN'T THNK I CD'V FIGURD IT OT THAT WELL. I'V NEVR BEN GOOD WTH CMPUTRS AT ALL.
    It wasn't hard. I just chose the only one I could understand.
    [By now the algorithm has gone to work and is pelting the enemy warship with plasma while activating your powerful electromagnetic lepton sheilds. Your ship's armor no longer must bear the brunt of the enemy plasma attack, and you are giving as good as you take, and the ship is veering around your opponent and towards their escape conduit. A gigantic explosion of plasma rips into your shields, but is just barely unable to penetrate. Your shields will break down soon, but you are getting much closer to the escape conduit. Suddenly a voice blares over your ship's P.A. system.]
    *ATTENTION, FUGITIVES. CEASE YOUR ATTEMPTS TO ESCAPE OR FIGHT. REINFORCEMENTS WILL ARRIVE SOON, RENDERING ANY ATTEMPTS OF THIS KIND FOOLISH AND DOOMED TO FAILURE. YOU WILL SURRENDER IMMEDIATELY AND BE TAKEN AS PRISONERS OF THE YZXDGLN EMPIRE TO THE PENAL COLONY ON VTHGBNT-GAMMA-OMICRON. IF YOU DO NOT AFFECT THIS COURSE OF ACTION IMMEDIATELY, WE WILL SUMMON REINFORCEMENTS AND TAKE YOU BY FORCE. REPEAT: IF YOU DO NOT AFFECT THIS COURSE OF ACTION IMMEDIATELY, WE WILL SUMMON REINFORCEMENTS AND TAKE YOU BY FORCE. END COMMUNICATION*
    O NO. NT NW. DARN T.
    What is it, Bzsrgpt?
    HGXCL TLD ME A LNG TIM AGO. YU REMEMBER WHEN HE MENTIONED THE BIT ABOUT YU HAVING CO-RESCUEES? WELL, THEY WER FRM A MCH DIFFRNT TIM PEROD. THEY WER TH CREW F TH MARIE CELESTE, A SE-SHP ON YOR ATLANTC OCEN. WE ABDCTD THM ALL, N A TELEPORTR ACCIDNT SIMLAR TO YORS. YOR SPECES NW REGARDS T AS A GRAT MYSTRY, BT WE KNW WHT RELLY HAPPND. AFTR WE ABDCTD THM, THEY PANICD AND TRYD TO FIGHT US. WE WULD HAV WON ESLY F ON F THM HADNT ACCIDNTLY ACTVATD TH TELEPORTR. N ANOTHR ACCIDNT, THS ON EVN MOR SIMILR TO YORS, THEY WER FLNG NTO TH SHP'S FUTR, A FUTR WHN T WS A DERELICT WRECK FLOTNG N SPAC-
    [Bzsrgpt is inturrupted by a gigantic explosion, a garbled attempt at communication over the damaged P.A. system, and a wooshing sound as your ship reaches and enters the escape conduit, deactivating it in the process. your ship shudders and just barely manages to stay in one piece as the normal laws of physics rush back into application around you. Your severely damaged ship reels, but does not break apart.]
    OKA, LOKS LIK TH RST F TH STRY S GONNA HAV TO WAT. WE'R GONG TO HAV TO LANCH TH ESCAP PODS, BECAS THS SHP S NEVR GOING TO GT US BACK TO CIVILIZATION.

    (view changes)
    2:31 pm

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